Who, Me?

Born and raised in small town, Virginia, I have since lived all over the world.  From Richmond to Philly, Jackson to Melbourne, Macon to Burlington, Clarksville to Oahu, Columbia to Gambrills, Johnson City to Nashville, the Carolina coastline, and now full circle coming back home, it’s been quite the journey.  I have two 20-something girls and one growing teenage boy. Probably my biggest weakness is what I like to call ‘too many things’. Sometimes I overwhelm myself with the sheer magnitude of everything I enjoy doing from puzzles to gardening to reading, with lots of crafts, tennis/pickleball, and theological arguments discussions in between. Did I mention that working full-time has put a cramp in my TMT style?

Although I led worship for over 25 years in at least 4 different denominations (many more if you consider the military ecumenical model), raised 3 kids, home schooled for 15 years, successfully work in customer service/sales, managed to stay married for 28 years before calling it quits, and have tons of wonderful friends, I still struggle at times with the feeling that I haven’t done anything meaningful with my life. Welcome to my mid-life crisis.

cropped-refuge-worship-color.jpgAn avid reader, I am consistently in the middle of 5+ books at a time (some people call this a symptom of codependency, but I call it an obsession with words). I read mostly fantasy/science fiction but also enjoy theology and self-help books (usually health-related, both mental & physical, and now delving into the metaphysical realms).

I also like to talk – a lot (‘wordy’ is an accurate description for most of my writing; I am working hard at becoming more concise). Talking is my way of processing what’s going on in my head/heart.

My reasons for keeping a blog have changed right along with my personal journey. Today, I have come to the conclusion that connection is the key to life, and love is the only good criteria for anything. But because it’s nigh unto impossible for us to connect outside the boundaries of our own personal grids (past experiences that shape the way we interpret language and thus the way we think about any given topic), real connection with others requires learning to think beyond the edges of our own boxes. I used to call it “taking beliefs out to their furthest conclusion to see if they still make sense there”; but really, I just enjoy crashing against envelope flaps, consequences be damned.

No wonder a friend once nicknamed me “controversy”.

As to why I picked the blog handle Judah First …

In the Book of Genesis, Leah had three children in an attempt to win her husband Jacob’s love. When her fourth son was born, she said “Now I will praise the LORD!” (Judah means ‘praise’ in Hebrew.) I imagine this meant she had finally decided to look to God for her self-worth. The Tribe of Judah was first in everything amongst the twelve – first to battle, first to break camp, the worship leaders, and the line of kings. To me the screen-name ‘Judah First’ is code for ‘Praise First’, and reminds me to live a life of gratitude no matter what circumstance I find myself in.

I love a great conversation and welcome your comments.  I hope you’ll feel free to think out loud with me. Please be aware that comments personally attacking me or any of my other readers will be deleted. And do me the honor of acknowledging your source if you wish to copy any of my work.

Many thanks for reading!

Peace, Love, and Light,


33 thoughts on “Who, Me?

  1. Hi Cindy
    I am enjoy your blog. I will walk this journey with you my friend. With prayers and praises we will get through it. Your sincere honesty to lay it all out, is really admirable. It is also really intense, especially the knowledge about the Word.


  2. Hi Cindy. It’s so funny. I’ve been studying these passages for a while now. I love you mentioning Leah’s fourth son Judah. I’ve been meditating for a while now on the words of Scripture where Leah changed from hoping for her husbands love to recognizing Gods’ love. Did you also notice that Judah was Leahs fourth son, four being the number of creation. She spoke, “I praise Jehovah”. I see an utterance of prophetic praise breaking forth from her, perhaps even the first words spoken over her son.
    Love your writings. They always speak to my spirit.
    As to your “mid-life crisis”, are you kidding me? You’re one of the most fascinating women I’ve ever known. God has blessed you with eyes to see and ears to hear and the ability to translate what you see and hear into wonderful loaves of bread and baskets of fish. You encourage and bless. I know your struggles, your willingness to open up and share. Perhaps you don’t yet have the job of your dreams, but you are fulfilling your purpose.
    You are deeply loved my friend.


  3. I like that. One of my favorite names is Leah, and that’s what I love about her. She may not have been Jacob’s favorite, but God favored her. She found solace in Him. Thank goodness, cause how awful would that be to only be married so your husband could get your sister? She was blessed with many children, while Rebekah was not. And from what I’ve read, Jesus was descended from her line, and not Rebekah’s. So interesting.


    • Yes, I find that throughout the Scripture God chooses the marginalized and unloved to pour out His grace. Gives me GREAT HOPE! 🙂 Reminds me of all of the other “unmentionables” in Jesus’ lineage … Moabites (Ruth), prostitutes (Rahab) … the list goes on!


  4. I have a son the same age, we can commiserate together! Glad to have been introduced to you through the blog hop 🙂 i love that your blog name represents your foremost priority. It’s so valuable to remember that and take comfort in the journey we’re so blessed to be on.


    • If commiserating will help me get through the years of raising a teenage boy, then WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR??! lol Some days I just blame everything on Menopause, you know?

      Looking forward to reading lots more from you, Holli.


  5. Judah first is a significant name… I enjoy that concept. May the LORD increase your wisdom and discernment as you blog in these final times. The Chosen of the LORD are certainly called to Holiness. Shalom


  6. Hi Cindy, it’s nice to meet you. I saw the feedback link you submitted–thank you!–and either Jennie or Michelle or I will get back to you this week. I just wanted to drop by and say hi and give you that quick update.


    • Nice of you to check in on me, Guap! All is well, never fear.

      I don’t really tend to post all that often, but yesterday I was working on one about why I didn’t write for last week’s flash fiction. My life stays pretty busy but I hope to keep putting stuff out there soon. Take care!


    • Hey, Guapo, just wanted to give you an update. All hell broke loose last week when my Mom was in a car accident. My family or origin has been through quite a bit the past year. Anyway, that’s why I haven’t gotten around to writing – too busy escaping into Skyrim for sanity’s sake. 😉 I’m reading what I can, though, so keep writing and bringing a smile to my face!!


      • Egad! Hope Mom is alright, and there are no serious repercussions from the accident.

        I think I’m done, at least for a while. I ran out of things to say, and am in no hurry to dive back in.
        Still reading though.


      • I understand. I’m kind of out of words at the moment as well. I think ‘life’ has drained me dry.

        Meanwhile, the real worry for my Mom is that she’s losing the will to live. I’m hoping she keeps a positive attitude through the coming months of rehab.

        Take care, Guapo … I look forward to reading more of your words in future.


  7. Pingback: Life In 6 Songs: Vol. 23 (Chenoa and Cindy), (plus a special announcement!) | Running On Sober

  8. Hi Cindy! It’s a pleasure to meet you. I like your “Judah First” meaning.

    I’m clicking over from your “life in 6 songs” guest post – to which I clicked over from Chenoa’s Life Corked…just letting you know in case you like dot-to-dot puzzles. 🙂

    Emily Grace


  9. Hey! This is, hopefully, the most automated comment you will ever-ever receive from me. I’ve popped over to say I finally put together the blogroll for NanoPoblano, I wanted you to check it out, and make sure that (1) you still want to participate and (2) your blog name is written as you want it written, and (3) I didn’t leave out super important information. Then, leave a comment introducing yourself. This is the page I’ll be directing people to through the month, so I’m hoping they’ll see your comment and be excited to go check you out. It should say something like, “Hey, Cheer Peppers– I’m So&So. I write about such&such. Come by and say hey.” I’ll be pruning comments on that page so it’s just link backs from posts, positive Pepper messages, and your intro. I’ll be sharing the page tomorrow night, all over town, so if you can put something up before then, that’d be awesome. If not, no worries, we have a whole month to go. https://rarasaur.wordpress.com/nanopoblano-2015/


  10. I’m visiting from Spoken Like A True Nut. I’ve read your comments on several posts and you often make me laugh out loud. Today was one of those days and I decided I needed to visit.

    It’s very nice to meet you 🙂 Twenty-nine moves in 28 years? Yikes. From someone who can count the number of times I’ve moved on 1 hand and probably have fingers left over, your experience is quite the achievement!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for stopping by, Joanne! Nice to meet you as well. 🙂

      P.S. I am SO glad I make you laugh – laughter is good medicine, and something I cannot live without. Always a pleasure to give it away. 😀 Too bad my blog posts tend not to be as funny as my one-liner comments. Oh, well, not everyone can be a Maineiac, covered in beer, byronic man (my personal favorites when it comes to hilarious blogs)!

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Hi Cindy, I am just discovering now that your name is not Judah, lol! I wish you would have corrected me. Thanks again for participating in my challenge. I read here that you once lived in Philly. Since that is my home, I wonder when you were here and what section of the city did you call home?

    peace, Linda


    • Hi, Linda, I don’t usually publicize my actual name on my blog. Something deep within me likes ‘flying under the radar’ somehow. 😉 And thanks for posting the challenge. You got me writing again (a bit…)

      As to Philly, my husband attended Westminster Seminary back in 1987-88 and we were living somewhere around there … maybe the area name started with a G? I’m sorry, but I have moved so many times that it all starts to run together! And that was many moons ago, another lifetime it seems. It certainly never felt like ‘home’ since we were there less than a year. I was working out in (I think) Montgomeryville or something like that. It was about a 30 minute drive from where I lived.

      What I remember most was a farm we used to visit to buy homemade ice cream. We would eat it outside where we could see (and smell!) the cows the milk came from. 🙂 Good times.

      I don’t suppose (by chance) I lucked out and was drawn for the free astrological reading… 😉

      Love and light to you,

      Liked by 1 person

      • Did you live in Glenside? I googled the seminary and it located there. I live about 15 minutes away from there and it a great area. Don’t know about the farm you mention but it sounds lovely. Regarding the free reading, I will be deciding soon. Just want to give time for others to contact me to share their interest. thanks to you I know about the email glitch. Who knows how long it has been an issue?

        love and lite,
        Linda ( litebeing)

        Liked by 1 person

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